I don’t like feeling this way. There’s so much more going on in the world that I feel guilty when I am in this state. Especially knowing how blessed and fortunate I am. But, its not an emotion. Its an environment of negativity and the need to distance myself from everyone. I can’t just ‘get over’ it or ‘be happy’. Nobody understands and its so difficult at times to explain how this isn’t something I can control. Its so overpowering sometimes I feel like I’m literally trying to break out of my own body but it won’t let me. I’m a prisoner in my own mind. I don’t like asking for help but its getting to a point where I can’t do this on my own anymore. Its starting to effect me in ways I never imagined. I don’t know what to do but just sleep hoping when I wake up I will feel different. I wish I had specific reasons, reasons people could understand. I just don’t know.